Hotel Denouement fire. (Possibly)
False Spring Queen
- You may wish to consult
Carmelita (disambiguation)for other, similarly-named pages.
- "Don't even THINK of eating around here, you cakesniffers! Nobody wants to have lunch with people who live in the Orphans Shack! Cake sniffing orphans in the orphan shack! Cake sniffing orphans in the orphan shack! Cake sniffing orphans in the orphan shack!"
- —Carmelita insulting the Baudelaire orphans
The Austere Academy
The Baudelaire orphans first encounter Carmelita in The Austere Academy. She rudely refers to them as "cakesniffers", tells them to get lost, and makes their lives difficult at the school. Isadora and Duncan Quagmire aren't fond of Carmelita either. Carmelita ridicules the Baudelaires for being orphans and having no parents, as if them losing their parents is somehow something "funny" instead of serious. She creates a jeer and bullies them constantly, enticing other students to join in the bullying.
Carmelita was in the same class as Violet (Mr. Remora). Every few minutes Carmelita would lean forward and poke Violet with a stick, whisper "orphan", and Violet would lose her concentration and forget to write down some detail of Mr. Remora's latest story.
Carmelita is one of Vice Principal Nero's favorite students, and he plays favorites with her. She is also given a job by Coach Genghis (Count Olaf in disguise) to tell the Baudelaires when they are required to attend S.O.R.E. sessions (after which she would snobbishly demand a tip).
When the Baudelaires are expelled from school, they are relieved they will never have to deal with Carmelita again... or so they think.
The Slippery Slope
They meet her again in The Slippery Slope, while she is traveling with a group of Snow Scouts to celebrate False Spring in the Mortmain Mountains. The two elder Baudelaires had enough troubles in the Mortmain Mountains without running into this unpleasant person, and at the sound of her voice they almost turned around and took their chances once more with the snow gnats swarming outside.
Near the end of the novel, the Baudelaires unmask and reveal their identities to her. After Violet and Klaus rescue Sunny, Carmelita quickly joins Count Olaf's and Esmé Squalor's troupe, after Esmé claims she will buy Carmelita all sorts of "in" outfits. Carmelita threatens to kill the Baudelaires and Quigley Quagmire by pushing them off the mountain, saying she is ready to start an exciting and fashionable new life. The Baudelaires and Quigley escape on a toboggan.
The Grim Grotto
In The Grim Grotto, she is a "tap-dancing ballerina fairy princess veterinarian", as described by herself in a song:
- C is for 'cute'
- A is for 'adorable'!
- R is for 'ravishing'!
- M is for 'gorgeous'!
- E is for 'excellent'!
- L is for 'lovable'!
- I is for 'I'm the best'!
- T is for 'talented'!
- A is for 'a tap-dancing ballerina fairy princess veterinarian'!
The song was so irritating, and sung so poorly, that Violet and Klaus almost felt as if they were being tortured after all, particularly as Carmelita kept on singing it, over and over and over. Klaus comments that someone should tell Carmelita that the word 'gorgeous' does not start with 'm'.
Olaf is persuaded to name his submarine the Carmelita after she says the Olaf is a "cakesniffing" name.
The Penultimate Peril
At the Hotel Denouement in The Penultimate Peril, she says she's a "ball-playing cowboy superhero soldier pirate" and dresses as one. Carmelita's spoiled attitude appears to have to have been exacerbated under the care of Esmé Squalor.
Olaf becomes increasingly tired of her attitude and violently knocks her to the floor while taking her harpoon gun, ending their already tenuous relationship.
Carmelita submits a book about how wonderful she believes herself to be as evidence in a trial against Count Olaf and the Baudelaires.
It is unknown whether she survived the fire at the Hotel Denouement.
- "I'm the cutest, prettiest, nicest girl in the whole school."
- —Carmelita, regarding herself
In The Austere Academy, Lemony Snicket describes her as a rude, violent and filthy little girl. He mentions that if you were going to give a gold medal to the least delightful person on Earth, you would have to give that medal to a person named Carmelita Spats, and if you didn't give it to her, Carmelita Spats was the sort of person who would snatch it from your hands anyway. This implies that Lemony Snicket despises Carmelita more than he does Count Olaf. He says it is a shame he must describe her to the reader because there are enough ghastly and distressing things in the story without even mentioning such an unpleasant person. Snicket warns that one should stay as far from Carmelita as possible, and Duncan Quagmire tells the Baudelaires that the less time a person spends with her the happier he or she will be. Isadora once wrote this poem: "I would rather eat a bowl of vampire bats than spend an hour with Carmelita Spats."
Carmelita is a mean, arrogant, snobby and selfish girl who cares for nobody but herself, demanding respect and reverence for herself, and insults the Baudelaires by calling them "cakesniffers". Carmelita acts as if she is the center of the universe and the entire world revolves around her. Her spoiled personality makes her show no respect to her elders and the world around her.
Esmé seems unaware of these traits or even is implied to adore them, spoiling and fussing over Carmelita, of which Olaf highly disapproves. Olaf seems rather annoyed by her, as he is used to having things his own way, and it comes as a blow when Esmé seems more interested in Carmelita's needs. When Esmé was convincing Carmelita to join them, she tells her, "You'll be the daughter we never had". Even though Olaf is less fond of Carmelita, and this dislike grows through the series, both he and Esmé seem to bend to Carmelita's every whim. He is persuaded to name his submarine the Carmelita after she says the Olaf is a "cakesniffing" name. He also renamed his boat from the Count Olaf to the Carmelita.
She wrote an autobiography titled Me: The Completely Authorized Autobiography of the Prettiest, Smartest, Most Darling Girl in the Whole Wide World which was published by Spoiled Brat Press. An excerpt from page 793 is included Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography which details her misguided encounter with a V.F.D. librarian.
Behind the scenes
She is portrayed by Kitana Turnbull in the Netflix adaptation.
- Her hair is a reddish-ginger color on the cover of both the UK and US books.
- In The Slippery Slope, Esmé lists the fortunes the villains will steal from the captured Snow Scouts. One of these is "the Spats fortune."
- It is implied that Carmelita's parents are rich and could be connected to V.F.D.
- In Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography (which takes place after A Series of Unfortunate Events) Vice Principal Nero sends a letter to Carmelita's parents, in which Carmelita seems to be alive.
- It is never explained what "cakesniffer" means. It may refers to cake being an expensive luxury the Baudelaires are too poor to afford, so all they can do is sniff cake from a distance. It may also relate to the saying "Let them eat cake" which the Baudelaires hear in the next book.
- The Austere Academy
- The Slippery Slope
- The Grim Grotto
- The Penultimate Peril
- Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography (mentioned)
- A Series of Unfortunate Events (TV series)