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S. Theodora Markson
Physical description


Hair color

Dark and large

Family members
  • Sister (unknown)

Chaperone (rank: 52/52)




S. Theodora Markson is a V.F.D. chaperone. Lemony Snicket is apprenticed to her in All the Wrong Questions, finishing his apprenticeship at the end of Why Is This Night Different from All Other Nights?.[1]


Ranked last out of 52 V.F.D. chaperones, Theodora is the least successful chaperone available to be apprenticed to. She has wild hair that gives brushes nightmares and drives a green roadster that has seen better days.

Incredibly self-confident, S. Theodora Markson tends to assume that she always has the upper hand in her investigations. Often prone to following false leads and elevating clues that are intended to mislead, Theodora is often the source of Snicket's frustrations, and she regularly reminds her apprentice of his place. 

It is unknown what the S in her name stands for, though Snicket enjoys prying in jest. Whenever a character asks her what the 'S' stands for she replies with different words or sentences that start with S. Her first name is never revealed.

Despite her seemingly arrogant personality, there are certain rare moments that fully showed her as somewhat bearable and could even be considered kind, such as at the end of chapter 12 of the first book, where she offered her hand and removed the probation of Lemony Snicket,which could be seen as an act of gratitude.




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